When loss happens and the life you once knew – at one time loved – comes to an end, it is important to know how to connect with your inner strength and wisdom. Navigating the ensuing journey of heart-ache and pain from losing a job, a loved one or a relationship can leave you feeling disempowered, unsupported and uncertain of yourself at times. Emotions may be overwhelming, but through my own experience of loss and heart-ache, I found that the surest way out of turmoil was to reconnect with the truth, love and support of my inner-self, listen to the wisdom behind the pain and honor the path I was walking, hand in hand with my spiritual nature.
Emotional Mastery is Key to Moving On
To regain my center and self-confidence I had to be being willing to be with my emotions, be honest about how feel; accept the negative and positives of the situation, learn to manage your stress and shift your thinking from what makes you angry and fearful to self-compassion. My spiritual truth became my litmus test when my thoughts started spinning and I felt out of control. I learned to say, “How is this feeling serving me – all of me, right now?” You might also find that having a support network of those who understand what you are going through, and who are willing to listen without judgment as you experience the ups and downs is helpful as you work through emotions. A friend, family member, support group or therapist can make the difference in a day when you are vacillating between hope and hopelessness.
Especially in the early stages the constant flux of difficult emotions makes it challenging to focus on anything, let alone finding the courage to take next step forward. With life turned upside down, you may not be able to make positive, constructive choices. All too often people make important decisions about finances, possessions or children in states of confusion and emotional imbalance. This is where being in tune with the truth of your essential self, inviting answers that speak your truth will inspire perspective, insight and guidance that you confidently act upon. Most importantly you will know how to right your keel when you get out of balance.
In my work as a therapist, I find that many people who are looking to heal from loss are focused on ‘fighting back’ as opposed to clearly thinking about their own future. They are unclear about their priorities or how to start over; afraid of financial repercussions or how they will find meaning again. It can all be exhausting and stagnating. You can let go of the battle. Learning to acknowledge worry, and let it go; getting off of the merry-go-round of fear about making a mistake (it is normal to make mistakes); these are some of the ways to strike a healthier balance and open yourself to compassion rather than closing off in anger.
Be willing to fall back in love with yourself and your life. Be someone you like and care about. Allow time each day to connect within, intentionally open to the potential for new creative expression that feeds your soul on deep level. Rather than seeking approval or validation from others, find compassion for yourself and everything in your life that led to this point in time. Embrace the ups and downs and let go of self- judgment. To turn things around find things you are passionate about, dream about the future and trust in your own goodness. Love your soul, love that you are alive, and love the beauty to be found in each new day. Slowly, surely you will fall back in love with your life.
What can you say “Yes” to in your life that evokes the feeling of love? A favorite park, a beach or a place in the world? Movies, books, or museums? Love may have disappeared in your relationship or from your career, but love remains eternal as the foundational energy the universe.
Here are 3 powerful ways to fall in love with your life:
- Take some time each day to focus your thoughts and energy on things that you enjoy. Tune into your heart and ask, what do I love that feels freeing and energizing? Make a list of those things and listen to what they are telling you about reorganizing your life or reinventing yourself. Thinking about your life can be very freeing!
- Make a decision to be happy and make being happy a priority. Yes, there are up days and down days in life, but the gap between them can become much narrower when you know what makes you happy and decide to dwell there more often. Don’t let pain, overwhelm or sadness consume you and become who you are. Healthy balance is the key to feeling good.
- Be the person who is responsible for how you feel. Stop blaming others for your hurt, and connect with your inner power to become who you are meant to be – a fuflfilled, satisfied, joyful being having a worthwhile, unique life adventure. No one can make you worry or feel fear. When they arise let them flow through you and leave. It is possible to take responsibility for everything you think, say and do. Then when you make a decision about doing something you are prioritizing yourself, and not relying on others to make you feel good.
Self- Paced Course “Becoming Who You Are Meant To Be” is open for enrollment. In this course you will be taking a deep dive within in order to understand who you are meant to be. You will make shifts in your awareness and thinking to get the results you want, and live your life passionately, joyfully, and with meaning.