At Peace Within

At Peace Within

What is it about the holiday season that makes me feel so good? The most important and profound things in life – the people, emotions and shared experiences, familiar and new – make the holidays meaningful. Within that sense of meaning, everything seems to come alive in a special way.  The music, our family and cultural rituals, food only served at holidays and seasonal festivities are sensual delights.  Then there are the lovely expressions of Spirit – getting together with others to wrap gifts, decorating the hearth, toasting life or simply helping neighbors – that exude an energy of connection and demonstrate how good caring about each other and our world feels. The inspiring influences of this time of year, when compassionate thoughts, stories of kindness, acts of giving and receiving, and offerings of hope and love connect and uplift us, fill my heart with a high spiritual energy. It’s as though a light emerges from within me and shines more brightly the more I take pleasure in our seasonal togetherness.

 

How do we experience the joys of the season of light?

 

There’s a beautiful experience to behold in the season of light and it starts with finding peace and contentment within ourselves. From an intentional perception of appreciation for all we are, and all we have – even with the challenges we are currently moving past – we connect with our basic goodness, the essence of our true selves in our hearts, minds and souls. Focus upon that inner connection to goodness allows awareness of the light within to arise. Our own inner wisdom is the doorway beyond limiting thoughts and beliefs. Open your heart to what is truly most important for you and experience the intelligence of Spirit that fills your world with light. When I allow the energy of peace to flow through me, I can discern how I closed off a part of myself and was seeing the world through a narrow slit. With intention and attention to what mattered most to me I moved past what I was seeing with my limited sight.   When I choose my potential for good, and believe in the well-being of life, the door opens each day to a vast wonderland of ineffable joy.

Within each of us we can find the magic of good cheer, compassion and joys of the season. You don’t need to do anything extraordinary; just remind yourself of the peace and light that dwells in your own heart and mind, and intentionally focus on allowing it to shine brighter. You can imagine a simple candle growing brighter within or multiple candles lighting up your heart, your body, your home and your day. Surrender any resistance you may have to this satisfying experience and let that be enough. Do this for a few minutes each day and the peace in your heart is sure to echo throughout your activities not only this season but all seasons.

If you are looking for inspiration to guide you to a more peaceful perception of your life, my book,
Seeing With The Heart, A Guided Inspiration Journal is available here.

Episode 4: Your Anxiety Doesn’t Define You

Has anxiety become a daily struggle? Is your mind constantly racing with fearful thoughts, or you find yourself worrying about everything? When anxiety takes over it can leave you feeling isolated and lonely. The good news is that you do not need to be defined by anxiety. It is highly treatable and there are proven techniques and tools to help you address the underlying causes of anxiety. You can get past anxiety.

You can listen to the audio video or audio MP3 file below.

When Feelings Are Too Much

When Feelings Are Too Much

Learning to manage emotional upsets is a valuable skill on the journey through life. As human beings we rely on our emotions for expression of desires, response to conditions, and feedback about our experiences. E-motions are energy-in-motion, and emotional energy usually follows a pattern of growing and then dissipating as we shift mental focus from ideas, people, activities and circumstances. Depending on how closely we assign the significance of an experience or relationship to an essential or core belief we hold related to survival or self-identity, our emotions can escalate, gain momentum and we might find ourselves caught in an uncomfortable,  emotional loop.

 

Take a Break

 

When you find yourself overwhelmed with anger, sorrow, loneliness or fear and are unable to deal with the intense feelings in the moment, remember that you have a choice. You do not have to be in those feelings right now. In fact, if you are overwhelmed it is a sure sign that you need a break from the thoughts and feelings fueling the uncontrollable emotional state. Take a break and you will be better able to deal with the feelings later. Doing this does not mean that you are denying the emotions are there. It is important that you come back to the feelings when you are rested. Even if they have changed, acknowledging your feelings is key to allowing yourself to accept yourself fully. Oftentimes we want to push feelings away and if we do, we resist the information they provide about hindering beliefs we hold, about ourselves or others. After taking a break you may have a different perspective which can help you understand what is happening underneath the emotional upset, and prevent further painful emotional loops.

 

Here are some ways to let yourself take a break from your feelings:

1. Journal about how you are feeling. Writing out your feelings is a form of release and allows you to focus the emotional energy into words. As you write let yourself feel the emotions pouring out of you onto the page (or computer screen). Ask yourself, what else do I feel about this (relationship, situation, experience, etc.) and empty yourself of every thought and emotion that comes up. When you are finished thank yourself for acknowledging what you are feeling and imagine putting the pages safely into a box in the shape of a heart. You can lock it if you wish or set it aside for later.

2. Go within and create a safe space in your imagination, a comfortable chamber you mentally step into where you breathe and relax. As you step into your chamber leave your feelings outside the doorway. Create an image that represents of how you are feeling them in the moment and allow the image to encompass and protect the feelings outside your chamber door. Your feelings are still there and you can decide to pick them up again after you are done relaxing in your chamber, or let them dissolve within the image holding them.

3. Movement can help. Chose to think about something else for the time being. Go for a walk, go to the gym, change the scenery. Moving your body moves the energy and as you breathe and oxygenate your brain the chemistry changes in as little as 15 minutes.

4. Focus on taking care of you. Your mood can shift when you try something different. If you have been doing the same old thing every day, stuck in your feelings then try changing your patterns. Rather than going home after work or staying inside on the weekend and feeling lonely, take yourself for a drive in the countryside, go to movie, visit a museum. I worked with one young man who was going through a divorce and decided to take himself on a date. He had the best day he had had in a month.

Your feelings are not always easy to feel but you can become adept at feeling and appreciating them for the insight they offer into yourself when you allow and work with them. There really are no “bad” feelings for on the other side of every feeling is the opportunity and reward of moving into a better feeling state. Taking a break from emotional struggle is a valuable tool to help you manage the process of getting there.

 

Are you looking for guidance in managing your feelings? Coaching sessions are available via Phone, In-Person in Colorado or Skype.

What Else Is Possible?

What Else Is Possible?

STUCK IN THE SAME OLD STORY

 

Have you ever noticed the way events, relationships or outcomes to circumstances repeat in similar ways in your life? What if things appear the same way because you tend to look at your life and who you are from the same point of view year after year? For example, I have had jobs that offered me an income yet I never believed they were going to make me rich. In fact, I often felt underpaid. My point of view was based upon a belief I held that the kind of job that I was qualified for, or that I could get (ergo, that I deserve) would never make me rich. Interesting point of view! Rather than step beyond the limited belief I held about myself and jobs in general, I accepted my supposed fate begrudgingly. Why would I choose that? Why would anyone choose that perspective of themselves and their life? Aren’t we creative, powerful human beings with the ability to achieve our dreams? Or is that just for some other folks and not for me?

 

Emphasizing the Problems

 

It was life-changing to realize that I viewed myself as a victim rather a creator. I had seen myself as a limited being, defined by my education, up-bringing, religion, gender and a host of other external conditions. Unconsciously, I had bought the story that there are certain situations in life that are insurmountable which made me feel less than who I truly am. But when I started to question my reasons for denying my greatness, my human right to joy and fulfillment I realized I had to stop choosing problems, which was happening even while I thought I was seeking answers. The significance that I had given to relationship issues, body image, lack of money and career stagnation was all based on what wasn’t working for me and looking for answers to what I thought was lacking in me or my life was keeping me focused and stuck in the problems. This may sound counter-intuitive, like you can’t find an answer if you don’t examine the problem; but I have come to realize that there is more possibility for joyful outcomes through questioning what else is possible, what might be more true for me beyond the reality of the problem, and then opening to allow my inner self to guide me in the moment. There is a magic to living when I honor my innate goodness and connection with my divinity. I trust that my path will unfold easily, authentically and in balance free from the conditioned emotions of past experiences. That I am given what I need when I ask. This means that while I may listen to the viewpoint or perspective of another, I can give up comparing myself to others, ask myself what I want and choose just for me. When I ask what else is possible it is up to me to be aware of how I am feeling, surrender control and allow my inner guidance to give me the answers that will create the change I desire. This awareness, this sense of appreciation for my ability to consciously guide myself with compassion in alignment with inner knowing honors the true genius and unique being I truly am.

 

Are you enjoying the possibilities for your life?

 

Consider what comes up for you when you are in judgment of yourself. Is there something that you don’t like about yourself? If you are down on yourself then reaching for a solution from that feeling of dissatisfaction only perpetuates the fact that you are uncomfortable with who you are or what you are doing. The good news is that recognizing when you are judging yourself is an opportunity to ask some questions about what else is possible that will shift you into satisfaction. Start with appreciation for the many ways you are supporting yourself and the unique abilities that make you, you. Notice any thoughts that arise that tell you, you aren’t capable and remember they are just an interesting point of view, not set in stone. Ask yourself, what would open up for me is I started enjoying myself? What could I create in my life if I see myself and my life as an endless gift? You will discover yourself to be a greater person than you had realized.

 

Are you ready to start transforming your emotions and thoughts? Private coaching sessions are available.

Episode 3: Tune Into Your Inner Rhythm

Marching to the beat of your inner music enlivens the journey of living authentically, your way. As you become familiar with your inner rhythm you strengthen connection with a reliable guide, respectful of your desires and choices. Following your inner rhythm you find clarity and satisfaction in your day.

Tune Into Your Inner Rhythm

You can listen to the audio video or audio MP3 file below.

Marilyn Decalo Logo, Phoenix

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